Wednesday, October 17, 2012

What Happened to Wake

I had a dream wherein I felt my parents were getting divorced.  They lived in a smaller house, white walls, no portraits of us hanging on the walls. A large bowl sat out near the sink, white porcelain with pink flowers.  In it, there were pink squarish cuts of pearled ham, roast beef, and something else darker. A man came with a white piano that rolled easy and it had food on it, some wrapped in butcher paper, some in ziplocs..  Steaks, ham, fish with diced peppers, and a bag of circus peanuts.  The food/piano man insisted I pay for all the circus peanuts I'd eaten, but I hadn't.  My sister said she did, so my father yelled at her to pay for her silly circus peanuts.  My mother and youngest sister left to go do something.  I took a long shower.  They had cakey soap and I had to wash myself over and over again.  I left the wrapper for the soap in protest on the shower floor.  My dad wanted to  do something.  He said, let's do something. I wanna do something.  I said let's go to a baseball game.  We were suddenly at Turner field, but the regular season was over.  Little league teams were warming up beside varsity softball teams.  And then we ran into my mother and her new boyfriend.  I ate a hot dog.  I didn't make eye contact.  I felt weird.  My father was angry. I ate chili cheese on my hot dog.  I took a bathroom break, but the field's bathroom was their bathroom.  The soap wrapper still there.  I pissed on it.  It was feeling good.  I realized I was pissing on myself for the first time since I was a child. I woke at nearly 11 am, damp, with a slight cough.

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